As noted on Wednesday by trashy Howard County blogger Bill Woodcock, I will be taking part in duckpin bowling tournament next Saturday, June 25. My opponent in this tournament will be none other than trashy Howard County blogger Bill Woodcock. See, several weeks ago, he posted the New York Times article on the decline of duckpin bowling on my Facebook page and challenged me to a throw down.
The youngest of his four children, Amy took to the game like – well, you know. “I never really found the sport to be difficult,” she said. By 12, she had her trusty red-and-white ball, engraved with her given name.
Little did Bill know, I was at the AMF in Timonium when he wrote his challenge. I was born for this throwdown. I have promised all that my honorable opponent is full of stewed cabbage and Donald Trump blustery. He shall be defeated and glory shall reign upon me and my favored guests. My enemies shall be smote with the anger of a thousand lionfish!
Of course, we are doing this for charity. Bill is playing for Living in Recovery in Howard County and I am playing for Planned Parenthood. Also, we have theme songs. Obviously, mine is Taylor Swift’s “Shake it Off” and Bill’s is “SexyBack” by Justin Timberlake. As Bill plays for the honor of Oakland Mills, I promise, yet again, Long Reach shall crush them.
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For HoCo King of Duckpin bragging rights, a battle so big, Howard County couldn’t contain it! (Also, no duckpin lanes in Howard County). Howard County Board of Appeals chair James Howard takes on Howard County civic leader and blogger Bill Woodcock in a best 2-of-3 duckpin bowling war!
Image by Valerie Everett / Wikimedia.